Pro 16:16 I How much better to get wisdom than gold! And to get understanding is to be chosen above silver.
It took several months for Jeremy and Tiffany to move onto their land due to the weather going from one extreme to another. It rained so often that it took a long time to prepare the property. They were finally able to move into their new home by July, despite the fact that not everything was fully move-in ready. They were resilient in making it work for them and by August everything was complete.
At the end of July, we had 17 goats in total. We were blessed by our neighbor, who decided to get out of the goat business and sold us some of her goats at a very reasonable price. So, now our herd consisted of two one hundred percent Boer goats, one pet wether, seven full-grown nannies, and seven kids (3 girls and 4 boys). We also had thirty-eight chickens and on top of that, the garden was producing more veggies than I could keep up with. It was truly awesome.
We were full of hopefulness, joy, and gratefulness at this point. We believed that finally, we were heading in the right direction, and it would lead us to being able to sustain ourselves by farming. Plus, my children were growing and becoming so close together that they were inseparable. Jazmyn decided she would teach Asher how to talk, especially since she is really good at talking, and I was teaching her how to read, write, and arithmetic. Life for us was going so smoothly.
On July 10, 2007, my journal was just pumped full of praises and scriptures. Looking back, it is sad to know that in just eight days my journal entries would change from joy to tears.
Our goats started to become sick, and in one weekend we lost two of our nannies and one of our young kids. We found out that our goats were suffering from a worm load. My husband and I started to treat them all with various types of wormers and minerals to try to save the herd. The only problem is that sometimes no matter how hard you try, goats still die.
By August 6, 2007, we had lost six of our goats. So, in 20 days we were down from a herd of 17 to a herd of 11, and the deaths were definitely causing emotional turmoil in both Josh and me. We lost another goat a few days later. We lost four full-grown nannies, our four wethers, and one baby girl. I tallied all the goats we lost so far from the beginning of moving onto the farm, and it came to 14 goats total.
We learned a lot during this experience. We learned that we really needed to get more paddock areas for our goats to rotate them. At this time, we only had two places fenced in to rotate. We learned how to check for anemia. We also learned the importance of using chemical wormers only when needed. We had really hoped to stay away from chemicals because we prefer to keep the goats on a more organic system, but we found out that even though herbal wormers work great, some parasites can still get in, thus if the goats get too bad, you sometimes have to step in with some heavy stuff. And we learned that you can never pray too much.
We also realized that Boer goats do not do well if it rains a lot. They have been so overly wormed because of people wanting to show them, that their immune system can’t fight against parasites very well. When the temperatures stay in the mid-80s, and it rains non-stop, parasites go on a breeding frenzy. This parasitic problem wasn’t just affecting Josh and me; farms all over were losing goats. In fact, A&M held meetings at extension offices to give advice on how to overcome this parasite problem.
We were downsized to only three grown does, two bucks, one pet wether, 2 young does, and one baby wether (it had recently been born). The only thing keeping me going was raising my two children. They never let it faze them every time we had to bury another goat, they just would pray that God would bless us with another goat. They just accepted it. Now, I know Jazmyn was four and a half and Asher was only two, so their understanding is rather limited. But Jazmyn was aware and took it all in and didn’t let it get her down. Watching their resilience, though, gave me some comfort. You can learn a lot from children.
I tried to focus on the good things, which one was we still had bucks and a few does. Plus, we knew it would be our strongest goats that survived. Yet, there were days that this trial overwhelmed me. I felt like a pendulum, one day I would praise God in my journal and the next day I would bemoan. I am very grateful that we are blessed with a patient God because I knew I was letting fear and anxiety overwhelm me instead of holding on to my faith.
Finally, though, in May, I had one of those “aha” moments. I was reading Psalms, and decided to look up the meaning of “meditate.” I found out it means to “dwell on anything in thought, to contemplate, to study (Webster’s 1928 Dictionary). I also looked up meditation and it means “To murmur, have a deep tone, bow down; close or continued thought, the turning or revolving of a subject in your mind, serious contemplation” (Webster’s 1928 Dictionary).
The whole, dwelling on something, revolving on a subject in your mind, continued thought, etc… really opened my eyes to what I was doing. The Father knew that my focus was off of Him. To be honest, my focus had been off of Him for a while. All I could think about was how great it would be to have a successful farm, and now that things weren’t going very well, all I could think about was all the bad things.
The real problem was when all was going well, I dwelled on possible future financial blessings from the farm, and then when things started turning sour, I dwelled on the trials. See the problem? In both situations, I wasn’t dwelling on the Father. It is easy to lose the right focus, and maybe it took losing some goats for me to get my focus in check.
Keep Focused
You know the old saying that perspective is everything. Well, there is a lot of truth in that. Many of us who live in the United States are very spoiled when it comes to facing hardships. I am not downplaying our various hardships, but we don’t have to endure random bombings like those in the Middle East endure. And we don’t have to worry about anti-Christian militias dragging us out of our homes and killing us. But these things are a reality to many in the world around us. The sad thing is what most of us here in America focus on are things like a better car, a bigger house, job promotion, clothing, vacations, money, etc…
I am not trying to be combative, but the truth is, we are bombarded by advertisements, news, social media, and other things that can be very distracting. We, as Christians, need to be diligent in remaining focused on what is the most valuable treasure in the whole universe, Our Father, Our Messiah, and Their coming Kingdom.
You know, God doesn’t ask too much out of us. He desires us to love Him and to love our neighbor (Luke 10:27). Plus, we learn in Ecclesiastes that it is a gift from God to enjoy the fruit of our labor (Ecc 2: 24; 3:13; 5:18). Three times Solomon mentions it. Why? Well, how many of us stop and take the time to enjoy the fruit of our labor instead of toiling for more ‘fruit’ never ceasing in the labor? How many of us live without anxiety by staying focused on the blessings we do have instead of wishing for something we perceive is better? How many of us focus first on the Kingdom of God and trust that God will provide for our needs? I’m preaching to the choir here.
We need to keep focused on God and the gifts and blessings He gives us. Time is short even if you live to 100 it seems short, and we need to stop wasting time by focusing on unpleasant things or things that cause frustration, stress, doubts, and anxiety. Every day we get closer to our own deaths, and what joy it will be if we look back and have no regrets because we kept focused on what was good, what was true, what was virtuous, and what was of good report (Phil 4:8 paraphrased).